Tour Journal ver 1.0
This past weekend was a time of travel for my band Antedote. We traveled to the distant land of San Diego to delight some 'hiphop heads' with our brand of jazzy-hiphopness. Though this should have been the highlight of the trip, it was nowhere near as exciting as the events or shall I say event that happened the night prior to the show. First a little background...
. . . . Both the percussion player(hereby known as EB magic) and the drummer(hereby known as Scurv Magic) rode out together hauling all of our gear in a U-haul trailer. Along with EB's recently acquired girlfriend, they left at 9am for an expected arrival of 2 or 3 pm at the hotel. Though the gig took place in downtown San Diego, the hotel that was booked was actually located on the border of Mexico and America. As in the last American exit. So close in fact that there was a digital sign reading 'Next exit Mexico, Be prepared to stop for inspection, no turnarounds.' Close enough that one could step outside of the hotel and see both the heavily guarded border as well as the Mexican flag flapping in the wind. This coupled with a sign advertising for a 'pizza, Chinese food, donuts' restaurant and a live Mariachi band playing in front of the Pizza Hut which also contained a check cashing place, set the appropriate tone for the night of inebriation soon to follow. The Magic crew arrived and, immediately upon receiving the rooms, began drinking. This brings us up to where I come in...
. . . . I began my travels along with my brother in the cramped backseat of a Scion Xb which was piloted by Mesi(the emcee) and the girlfriend of Mesi(hereby known as 'V') at around 7pm. After passing nervously through TWO different border checkpoints, conveniently placed inside of California, we finally arrived at the hotel after driving literally along the border of Tijuana and California around midnight. Upon arrival we were greeted by a glassy eyed EB along with his girlfriend, the brother of Mesi, and a friend of V. We were warned that Scurv Magic was acting as hall monitor and very adamant about people not smoking or drinking in his room, which turned out to be my room as well. And so our entire 'crew' was there and after a long ride, we were ready to 'let it all hang out'.
. . . . We entered the hotel to drop off our bags and survey the rooms. We were greeted in one of the hotels by none other then Scurv Magic himself who was noticeably, for lack of a better word, annihilated. This did not stop him however and he continued drinking and doing 'other' things along with the rest of us, to 'keep up', even though there was not a chance in hell that we could ever 'keep up' with him in his current state. Somewhere in his numb, drunken stupor his lower half began taking over his brain function and he announced to the room that he was going to try and 'get with' the friend of V. The following scene ensued with him following her around for the rest of the night, his pelvis seemingly guiding him around wherever she went. This proved to be quite a humorous sight since she was quite UNinterested in him. In other words, he was playing the role of 'scary drunk guy'....
. . . .Pretty normal sort of tour night right? Well it gets better. We all decided to crash out at around 4 am after being coaxed to exhaustion by the mixture of overtly loud snores of EB and EB's girlfriend whom had conveniently passed out in the bed they shared and the vacant mouth-open stare of Scurv Magic. Brother of Mesi, my brother, Scurv Magic, and me made our way to the room that we were to share for the night which happened to be next door to the room that we were just in. Here is the sleeping arrangement: I took one bed, my bro took the other, brother of Mesi took the hideaway bed, and Scurv was made to sleep on the couch cushions in between the beds. With this we uneventfully drifted off to slumber. Around 5 am I was roused from my sleep to the odd sound of liquid hitting something. I opened my eyes, unable to see through the darkness, figuring it was some strange noise the A/C was making. Allowing my eyes to adjust, I could barely make out the figure of somebody standing at the corner foot of my brother's bed. I insctinctavely exclaimed through the dead silence of the room,"YOUR NOT TAKING A PISS ARE YOU!?" The figure did not even move or make any sort of sign that it registered what I just said, so I rested my head on my hand and just sat there watching the figure, my mind racing to the possibilities that somebody had broken into our room. I then realized that this was Scurv magic who then sat at the foot of my bed and layed back down almost hitting me. Like a dead weight, I repeatedly yelled, 'get off my bed D___, get on your bed, what the fuck are you doing?, etc.' This noise woke up my brother who was in the neighboring bed, causing him to roll over in to a nice hot and steamy puddle of piss. That's right, good ol' Scurv Magic somehow woke up and relieved himself of the freshly filtered urine that filled up his bladder on the top of the comforter that my brother was sleeping under. Completely oblivious to the scolding of my brother and laughs of me, he just sat absent mindedly at the foot of my bed, drunkenly and incoherently defending himself and defending that he was 'on time to work' along with several other grunts and noises not found in the english language but shared amongst the drunks of the world. His drunkenness continued to deny that he had even stood up to pee when my brother turned on the TV to shed some light on the situation and we all found that indeed Scurv's pants WERE around his ankles. He again layed back down on my bed to which I somehow coaxed him back onto his little bed to which he immediately slipped back into a drunken unconsciousness. My brother then angrily took a shower and had to sleep in the fetal position on the very edge of the bed to avoid the spreading puddle of Magic piss....
. . . . Upon awakening to the odors of pee, Scurv Magic had no idea what had happened which meant absolutely nothing to my brother who was determined to bring retribution upon his little piss fetish friend. He would not even look at him or talk to him except for an assortment of colorful words and scolding accompanied by a hard punch to the shoulder. And at this point, the name 'Magic' was added to Scurv's name. The term 'magic' was previously reserved for the other member of the band whom had already embarrassed himself by self urination. This activity earned Scurv that honorable label as well....
. . . . Returning to the 'party room' I began to tell everyone else of the drunken peeing exploits of the early morning hours. Surprisingly, the majority of people in the group were not even surprised much less shocked. Instead there were comments made like, "oh yeah, I've peed on V", "Oh yeah, I've peed on Mesi", 'oh yeah I've peed while in bed with a boyfriend' , and 'I've peed myself before.' Out of the nine people that were staying in those hotel rooms, four of them had already performed extreme drunken self-urination or drunken unrination on their significant other. I personally have never even been close to that drunk. Does anybody else find that odd?
. . . . Both the percussion player(hereby known as EB magic) and the drummer(hereby known as Scurv Magic) rode out together hauling all of our gear in a U-haul trailer. Along with EB's recently acquired girlfriend, they left at 9am for an expected arrival of 2 or 3 pm at the hotel. Though the gig took place in downtown San Diego, the hotel that was booked was actually located on the border of Mexico and America. As in the last American exit. So close in fact that there was a digital sign reading 'Next exit Mexico, Be prepared to stop for inspection, no turnarounds.' Close enough that one could step outside of the hotel and see both the heavily guarded border as well as the Mexican flag flapping in the wind. This coupled with a sign advertising for a 'pizza, Chinese food, donuts' restaurant and a live Mariachi band playing in front of the Pizza Hut which also contained a check cashing place, set the appropriate tone for the night of inebriation soon to follow. The Magic crew arrived and, immediately upon receiving the rooms, began drinking. This brings us up to where I come in...
. . . . I began my travels along with my brother in the cramped backseat of a Scion Xb which was piloted by Mesi(the emcee) and the girlfriend of Mesi(hereby known as 'V') at around 7pm. After passing nervously through TWO different border checkpoints, conveniently placed inside of California, we finally arrived at the hotel after driving literally along the border of Tijuana and California around midnight. Upon arrival we were greeted by a glassy eyed EB along with his girlfriend, the brother of Mesi, and a friend of V. We were warned that Scurv Magic was acting as hall monitor and very adamant about people not smoking or drinking in his room, which turned out to be my room as well. And so our entire 'crew' was there and after a long ride, we were ready to 'let it all hang out'.
. . . . We entered the hotel to drop off our bags and survey the rooms. We were greeted in one of the hotels by none other then Scurv Magic himself who was noticeably, for lack of a better word, annihilated. This did not stop him however and he continued drinking and doing 'other' things along with the rest of us, to 'keep up', even though there was not a chance in hell that we could ever 'keep up' with him in his current state. Somewhere in his numb, drunken stupor his lower half began taking over his brain function and he announced to the room that he was going to try and 'get with' the friend of V. The following scene ensued with him following her around for the rest of the night, his pelvis seemingly guiding him around wherever she went. This proved to be quite a humorous sight since she was quite UNinterested in him. In other words, he was playing the role of 'scary drunk guy'....
. . . .Pretty normal sort of tour night right? Well it gets better. We all decided to crash out at around 4 am after being coaxed to exhaustion by the mixture of overtly loud snores of EB and EB's girlfriend whom had conveniently passed out in the bed they shared and the vacant mouth-open stare of Scurv Magic. Brother of Mesi, my brother, Scurv Magic, and me made our way to the room that we were to share for the night which happened to be next door to the room that we were just in. Here is the sleeping arrangement: I took one bed, my bro took the other, brother of Mesi took the hideaway bed, and Scurv was made to sleep on the couch cushions in between the beds. With this we uneventfully drifted off to slumber. Around 5 am I was roused from my sleep to the odd sound of liquid hitting something. I opened my eyes, unable to see through the darkness, figuring it was some strange noise the A/C was making. Allowing my eyes to adjust, I could barely make out the figure of somebody standing at the corner foot of my brother's bed. I insctinctavely exclaimed through the dead silence of the room,"YOUR NOT TAKING A PISS ARE YOU!?" The figure did not even move or make any sort of sign that it registered what I just said, so I rested my head on my hand and just sat there watching the figure, my mind racing to the possibilities that somebody had broken into our room. I then realized that this was Scurv magic who then sat at the foot of my bed and layed back down almost hitting me. Like a dead weight, I repeatedly yelled, 'get off my bed D___, get on your bed, what the fuck are you doing?, etc.' This noise woke up my brother who was in the neighboring bed, causing him to roll over in to a nice hot and steamy puddle of piss. That's right, good ol' Scurv Magic somehow woke up and relieved himself of the freshly filtered urine that filled up his bladder on the top of the comforter that my brother was sleeping under. Completely oblivious to the scolding of my brother and laughs of me, he just sat absent mindedly at the foot of my bed, drunkenly and incoherently defending himself and defending that he was 'on time to work' along with several other grunts and noises not found in the english language but shared amongst the drunks of the world. His drunkenness continued to deny that he had even stood up to pee when my brother turned on the TV to shed some light on the situation and we all found that indeed Scurv's pants WERE around his ankles. He again layed back down on my bed to which I somehow coaxed him back onto his little bed to which he immediately slipped back into a drunken unconsciousness. My brother then angrily took a shower and had to sleep in the fetal position on the very edge of the bed to avoid the spreading puddle of Magic piss....
. . . . Upon awakening to the odors of pee, Scurv Magic had no idea what had happened which meant absolutely nothing to my brother who was determined to bring retribution upon his little piss fetish friend. He would not even look at him or talk to him except for an assortment of colorful words and scolding accompanied by a hard punch to the shoulder. And at this point, the name 'Magic' was added to Scurv's name. The term 'magic' was previously reserved for the other member of the band whom had already embarrassed himself by self urination. This activity earned Scurv that honorable label as well....
. . . . Returning to the 'party room' I began to tell everyone else of the drunken peeing exploits of the early morning hours. Surprisingly, the majority of people in the group were not even surprised much less shocked. Instead there were comments made like, "oh yeah, I've peed on V", "Oh yeah, I've peed on Mesi", 'oh yeah I've peed while in bed with a boyfriend' , and 'I've peed myself before.' Out of the nine people that were staying in those hotel rooms, four of them had already performed extreme drunken self-urination or drunken unrination on their significant other. I personally have never even been close to that drunk. Does anybody else find that odd?

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